I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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