you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize