Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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