therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
