Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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