i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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