Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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