I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
