i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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