I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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