What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Randomize
