I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Randomize
