problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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