worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
