so explain again why im purple
no
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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