If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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