it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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