Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
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