My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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