Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
i believe in u and ur pee
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
