maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
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I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
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Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.