maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
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I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
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Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
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