Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
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