Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Randomize