so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
40s are totally the cure
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize
