We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize