Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize