brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize