Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
