he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Randomize