I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
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