They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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