no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
