He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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