and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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