I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize