Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
