i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
