I bet he comes in French.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
