just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
