Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Randomize