RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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