last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize