How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
