I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
