She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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