yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
