come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
