so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
