In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize