You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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